Showing posts with label leaving youth. Show all posts
Showing posts with label leaving youth. Show all posts

Sunday, September 18, 2011

From Miss to Ma'am

At what point in time did I go from Miss to Ma'am?  I was recently on the phone with a tech support person for my retail website and the girl I was speaking to was very nice, knowledgeable and...young.  I'm guessing she was in her mid-twenties.  At the end of the phone conversation she said, "Is there anything else I can help you with ma'am?"  Immediately my nose hairs crinkled and I was stunned silent.   I regained my phone composure, thanked her accordingly and that was that.  Or was it?  Over the following few days, I started trying to pinpoint exactly where in my life the switch took place.  From when did I go from youthful, artistic, dreamer/impressionable type, where life was a bowl of orange blossoms, to ma'am?
As a late bloomer, I related to the "college crowd" probably past my welcome, but at some point the college crowd stopped relating to me.  I was kicked out of the club without even realizing it.  Blindsided so to speak.  I should have guessed this was all happening when I started feeling victorious on the rare occasion that I got carded, or maybe the fact that I now own underwear that is sold in a plastic pack of multiples.
My ma'am change did not happen after getting married, nor did it happen after having my first child.  I feel this is a recent change, even though I can't quite pinpoint it.  If I had a guess, I would say it began somewhere between 1 and 2 years ago. 
According to the Kubler/Ross stages of grief model, I seem to be surfacing from the 1st stage of Denial and entering the 2nd stage of Anger, (judging by my crinkled nose hairs.)  There doesn't seem to be a time frame on all these stages.  That is individual.  It could take years!  After Anger comes Bargaining, the hope to postpone or delay.  That could get ugly, but since I lived the better part of 10 years in LA, I've seen that stage manifested in the most unfortunate ways and know better. 
Only after the 4th stage of Depression, will I begin to Accept.  And who knows what that means!?   I think I'll revisit cozy comfy Denial and report back on this issue later.